I am mother to four amazing children: Lily, Ellis, Ayda- and Zander. I am married to an amazingly supportive, freedom loving man named Eric. Together we live in my hometown- Dunkirk, NY. We have a strong support system here, between all of our parents and some close friends.
My journey into midwifery hasn’t been without stops and starts, ups and downs, roadblocks and dead ends. I originally thought that I wanted to become a certified nurse midwife (CNM) and I started on that path (which I was on for nearly four years as a part time student). I worked really, really hard, all while taking care of my growing family.
So in the fall of 2021, when NYS mandated the C19 vaccine for all SUNY students and healthcare professionals, it was really upsetting to have to pull out of my final year of nursing school. But the truth is, the path hadn’t been feeling resonant to me for awhile and I knew that the same level of government overreach and control was only going to follow me into the role as a licensed and regulated CNM. I wanted to become a midwife to serve women, not to serve the system. Luckily, I had been learning about unlicensed, independent midwifery from the ladies over at Indie Birth and saw this as an opportunity to re-route to a path that felt more authentic and in line with my values. Which is how I became an IBMS student and sought out a local apprenticeship.
I look back, wondering, when did I first hear the call to midwifery? I think that caring for others has always come naturally, but it wasn’t until I gave birth to my first child that I caught a glimpse of the power and magic of birth. Back then, I had no idea how transformative birth could be, but with each of my own pregnancy and birth experiences, I have grown exponentially. Each of my children have played (and keep playing) a role in guiding me back to my center; and each birth experience has revealed to me another layer of my journey. I love the idea that my children are helping me to become the truest and most authentic version of myself- that they have each reminded me who I am and what I came here for. They have shaped me just as much as I have (or will come to) shape them. It is such a beautiful unfolding, this soul dance.
I don’t know what my journey would look like, or if I would have found myself in the way that I have, if I hadn’t chosen to work with and learn from midwives along the way. And the best part about it is that so much of what my midwife did for me was simply just believing in me and holding space for me to learn, grow and open. It is so simple and so complex all at the same time! Sure, I am the one who chose to walk the homebirth path and had to do the inner work and the physical labor, but having her attention, love and support was such a guiding light for me.
And I want to shine that light for other women. Not in a heroic or savior sort of way, but more in the soul dance sort of way. What a deep honor and privilege it is to be trusted to hold the light for women as they journey within, travel between two worlds and emerge, reborn: a new mother. Holding space (and being held) through this rite of passage is such a healing and humbling gift. At the core of who I am, I am a giver and a healer.
The name Evan means “young warrior” which feels fitting because I am passionate and determined in the fight for women, birth and freedom. I feel it is my purpose, here in this lifetime, to serve women and their families. I believe that the call to radical midwifery is my soul’s calling. I have never been more certain or passionate about anything in my life. This type of midwifery, the sisterhood and community, is going to change the world, one birth at a time! It has certainly changed (or should I say awakened) me!